Undercover
by Glugentige
Summary: Alyssa wasn't supposed to fall for a member of the SOA. She was meant to do a job, but she dug herself deep in a hole and wasn't sure if she would get out alive, let alone with her heart intact. Rated:M because its SOA..violence & language.. Juice/OC
1. The Job

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Sons of Anarchy, they belong to the genius Kurt Sutter and FX! Only the OC's belong to me.

(Set after season 3 and before/during season 4)

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><p>Alyssa O'Donnell walked out of the ATF Oakland field offices building excited, yet a little apprehensive about her first assignment. She requested transfer from the New York offices for this exact assignment, but now that she was briefed and ready to begin she couldn't help but kick herself for ever leaving New York.<p>

Alyssa was fresh out of school and after interning with the ATF her senior year of college, they offered her a job as an agent, provided she completed her training. She knew she wanted to be an agent after her first day of her internship and worked hard all year to get in the physical shape required and studied diligently to pass the written tests. Thankfully all of her hard work paid off and she was at the top of the recruits that year.

During her one-year probationary period, she received a lot of brash and cross remarks from the other male recruits on the job. They all knew that she scored very high on her tests and some didn't like being upstaged by a woman. A lot of it was meant in jest, because deep down she knew that most of them would take a bullet for her, but she couldn't help but want to prove herself to them. Which is exactly what landed her here in Oakland, CA.

When the position opened up for a young female agent to go undercover to infiltrate an outlaw motorcycle club, she immediately sent in her request without thoroughly thinking it through. She knew that if she was accepted the guys would no longer be able to give her any qualms about her ability as a field agent. As much as she wanted to prove it to herself, she wanted to prove it to them more, so once her request was granted, she took the job and was on a plane to California in less than two weeks.

If she had taken the time to actually think it through, she would have come to the conclusion that a 24-year-old female with no actual experience in being alone in the field, much less undercover, should not take this as her first assignment. Sure, during her probationary period she worked several cases, and even made arrests, but all of those were done with senior agents right next to her able to step in and take over if needed. She excelled during her probationary period, which is why, she thought, that she was granted this position in the first place. If her senior field agent had given any indication that she could not do this job to their superiors, then she would not be on her way to Charming, CA right now.

She had heard the rumors of Agent Stahl and her brutal murder, and also that no one was ever prosecuted for it. Other rumors swirled around the offices about who did it, some believed it was the Irish Kings and others believed it was members of the Sons of Anarchy. A few others even said they heard that she had it coming. Either way, Alyssa wasn't too worried about that happening to her. She knew what people said about Stahl and her personality. Alyssa was nothing like Stahl and she wasn't going to go about her investigation the way Stahl would have. Alyssa was going undercover and now that her new background identity was set up, no one would even suspect anything.

The ATF already had a lot of information on the Sons of Anarchy motorcycle club, all Alyssa had to do was get close to a member or friend of the club and relay any information she had. There was no specific objective for her, anything she overheard, saw, or was told could only add to the case the ATF already had. The agency didn't want to risk losing another agent, so putting her in to actually get information out of them was a bad idea. Basically she was meant to be eyes and ears, but not a tool meant to influence anything.

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><p>Once inside her new apartment, she looked around the rooms to see how the agency had decorated it for her. There was nothing ostentatious about it. A plain brown couch sat in the living room facing an old looking television that she wished was a flat screen. There was an ugly green reclining chair in the corner next to an end table with a lamp on it. Beige carpeting was laid out in every room besides the bathroom and kitchen, which had ugly yellow tile. Her bedroom had a double bed, a dresser with a mirror connected to it, and an end table with two drawers. There was an empty small spare room that would be good for storage; because another bed would clearly not fit in it it was so small. Other than that, it was pretty basic and meant to set off the idea that she wasn't well off, all she could afford was what she had, and that wasn't much by the looks of this apartment.<p>

This job was only meant to last six months, a year at the most. All she had to do was get close to the club and get whatever information she could. The apartment didn't have to be anything other than what it was. She knew it was better looking like this so she didn't get attached to this town. She was told to only bring two bags of luggage with her, mostly clothes. She knew better than to bring any mementos or anything to make her feel at home, because this wasn't home. It was just a place where her current job was located. The people that she was going to meet and deceive weren't her friends, they were just part of the job.

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><p>So I recently fell in love with Sons of Anarchy and just watched seasons 1-3 on netflix and then watched season 4 on the computer, and I'm proud to say I'm addicted! I decided to write a story to pass the time until season 5 gets here. This will be my first story that I've written and I hope I can do a good job and do justice to the SOA characters. There might be some OOC at times, but bear with me, I'm trying! If you guys like it I will continue the story… thanks for reading!<p>

-Jade


	2. The Hospital

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Sons of Anarchy, they belong to the genius Kurt Sutter and FX! Only the OC's belong to me.

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><p>Sitting in her apartment and looking over the thick file in her hands, Alyssa wondered if the members of the club would trust her enough to even talk about minor club dealings around her. That is, if she was even able to get close enough to become a friend to someone. The file contained insignificant information on each of the members of the club. Looking through it, she knew though that Juan Carlos "Juice" Ortiz was going to be her best bet at getting close with someone. The other younger members like Jackson Teller and Harry Winston each had a woman in their lives and she wasn't going to risk any unneeded tension or drama. The other members like Munson, Trager, and Telford were older and wouldn't easily trust a newcomer. Lohman was too unpredictable and getting close to him could only prove bad for her.<p>

With her new background set up, Alyssa also had a part-time job at the local hospital. She was able to become a nursery assistant, which would put her in direct contact with Tara Knowles, the girlfriend of Jackson Teller and mother of his child. She was going to use this as her way in to the club. Her supervisor at the Oakland office set up an incident to happen in three days when both Knowles and herself would be getting off work at the same time. A man was going to come up to Alyssa in the parking lot and rough her up a bit while, if all went according to plan, Knowles would see and intervene bringing her straight to the club. It seemed like a rational plan and if she was able to act the part of scared little girl well enough, then Knowles would want to help protect her from her crazed ex-boyfriend.

It may have first seemed a little far-fetched to Alyssa, but after reading Knowles' file, she realized that Knowles was an all around normal good person who got stuck in this life. She didn't seem to have the mentality that other females associated with the club had. Alyssa firmly believed that Knowles would be her way in because, like herself, Tara also saw the good in people and wanted to believe in that above all else.

With their recent release from incarceration, her superiors knew that this would be the best time to get involved with the Sons. So much would be going on in their lives in and out of the club that her arrival and introduction to the club would hopefully be overlooked. At least she kept telling herself that.

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><p>The next day was her first day at work and as much as she wanted to hate it, she couldn't help but enjoy the day as it went on. The newborn babies were just the most precious things she had ever seen and when she wasn't absentmindedly staring at them, there were stacks of paperwork that needed to be sorted and filed. It wasn't as boring or as tedious as she thought it was going to be. She had only seen Tara Knowles twice that day and it was only when she was walking by not even giving Alyssa a second glance. She thought that this was going to be a little harder than she originally planned.<p>

She stood in front of the elevator and watched as the numbers lit up as they counted down to her floor. When the doors opened she saw Tara standing there saying goodbye to an older male doctor who got off on the same floor. She stepped on and smiled at Tara who was standing next to the elevator buttons.

"First floor please," Alyssa said as she stood next to Tara.

"Me too," she pointed at the already lit up first floor button. It was silent for a few seconds as Alyssa was thinking of what she could say, but Tara spoke up before she could. "I saw you today in the nursery wing, are you new?"

"Yes. Today is my first day, I'm a nursery assistant. I'm Alyssa, by the way."

She shook Alyssa's hand, "Tara. I'm a doctor; pediatrics." When the elevator doors opened on the first floor, both women got out and began walking the same way towards the cafeteria. "Are you going to lunch?" Tara asked Alyssa as she pointed to the cafeteria ahead.

"Yes. How's the food? Should I be worried?" Alyssa laughed.

"No, actually its pretty good. St. Thomas is lucky in that department." They were both silent as they each grabbed a pre-packed salad and water bottle and cashed out. "You can sit with me if you'd like. Who wants to sit alone on their first day," Tara told Alyssa as she started to walk in the opposite direction, but turned around and smiled at Tara's invitation.

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><p>Today was the day that Alyssa was set to get attacked. As the day was winding down Alyssa thought back to her three previous lunch conversations with Tara. Each day they told each other a little more about themselves and Alyssa decided it was best to stick to as much truth as possible, so she didn't get confused later on. The story she used for the reason she moved was because she wanted a change of scenery. Once the attack came, she would tell Tara that she left because of her psycho ex-boyfriend. She hoped that this would aid in Tara feeling sympathy for her because Tara also ran away from an ex, according to her file. The common background would help them get a little closer, she figured.<p>

Alyssa was a little surprised at how much Tara told her about herself. She was the mother of two children and her fiancé was a mechanic at the local garage Teller-Morrow. She also told some of her past in Chicago and how she decided to move back home to reconnect with her first love. Alyssa gave truthful information about how she grew up in Brooklyn and talked about how her parents still lived in the same house she grew up in. She told Tara that she hated the big city life and wanted to trade it for a nice town with sunny skies. When she saw Charming, CA on google maps, she knew it was the place for her.

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><p>As Alyssa walked out of St. Thomas hospital and into the parking lot she saw that Tara's Cutlass was still parked next to her car. She knew Tara wasn't far behind her because she didn't leave until she saw Tara with her coat on locking her office door. She dug around her purse until she had her car keys in her hand and went to unlock her door when someone from behind her grabbed her. He shouted something at her and swung her around to face him, grabbing her upper arms very tightly.<p>

"You stupid bitch," he yelled in her face. "You didn't think I would find you! Don't you think if you wanted to get away from me you should have at least changed your fucking name or stopped using your accounts! You are coming back to New York with me right now!"

"Let go of me, James. You are hurting me." Alyssa tried to wiggle free but his grasp on her was too tight. She noticed Tara walk out of the building when James was in the middle of his rant and she glared at him, giving him the signal. He hit her once, hard, the back of his hand clashed with the side of her face and the sting immediately brought tears to her eyes.

"Hey!" Tara shouted several yards away from where they were standing, but loud enough someone down the block could have heard. "Get away from her or I am calling the cops," she had her cell phone already in hand.

"I'm not done with you," he said loud enough to Alyssa before he sprinted down the street and out of sight.

Tara ran over to her and touched the right side of her face that got hit. "Are you okay?" she asked shocked. "He didn't cut it, but you are gonna' have one good bruise there tomorrow! What happened?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. Thanks a lot. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't of come out."

"What happened?" Tara asked again, waiting for a reply.

"He was my ex. I left New York because of him." Alyssa paused a little and then went on knowing she wanted to hear more. "It got violent and he just wouldn't leave me or my family alone. He started staking them to get to me, so I decided to just leave to make it safer for my friends and family. I didn't tell anyone where I was going, hoping he would never find me. I thought he would eventually just forget about me, even if he did find out where I was. I never thought he would actually come all the way here." Alyssa let a tear escape her eye that had built up from when he hit her.

"Ohmigod. Do you know anyone else out here? Is there somewhere I can take you? If he knows you work here he probably knows where you live now. Let me call the police?" Tara asked her, visibly concerned.

"No, I know no one besides you, and I don't want the police involved. They can never do anything, I learned that before, it just gets him angrier with me. If you would just take me home, so I can leave my car here, that might be good. I'll sleep with a knife just in case." Alyssa tried to reassure Tara.

"No, way! That man is a psycho, I can't leave you alone after what I just witnessed. Why don't you come with me? I know a way for you to be protected without the police getting involved."


	3. The Clubhouse

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Sons of Anarchy, they belong to the genius Kurt Sutter and FX! Only the OC's belong to me. 

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><p>When Alyssa woke up around 9 A.M., she almost forgot where she was. Glancing around the room and seeing posters of half naked women reminded her that she stayed the night in the clubhouse on Tara's insistence. After clearing it with Gemma, Tara assured her that until she could talk to her fiancé, who was returning from Tucson this afternoon, Alyssa should stay locked in one of the available rooms here for the night. Tara told her that her fiancé's old room was clean, unused, and would be fine for the night. Alyssa only worked part-time at the hospital and because she was off the next two days, she agreed. She did wish the members of the club had been here when she arrived after being hit in the face, but this would have to do.<p>

After getting up and refreshing herself in the adjoining bathroom, she got her cell phone out and called the number Tara programmed in the night before.

"Hello," Tara answered.

"Hey Tara, it's Alyssa. Just calling to check in with you."

"Oh, hi. How are you feeling today?" she asked with noticeable concern in her voice.

"I'm alright. Got a nice black eye though, makeup couldn't do the job."

"Ugh, I'm sorry. If it hasn't gone down by the time you go back to work you can just tell everyone I opened a door in your face. I already spoke to Gemma this morning and she should be at the clubhouse with my boys if you want to go out and hang out in there. I am leaving work at eleven and then I will be there."

Alyssa was thankful that Tara would be there in just two hours time. She knew that Gemma Teller-Morrow was a no-nonsense kind of woman and in all honesty, Alyssa would rather spend the day with any Son than with the woman described in the file she read. After putting the finishing touches on her makeup, she smiled at how well it looked that she was trying to cover-up the bruise, which only made it stand out more.

Walking into the main area of the clubhouse, Alyssa took in her surroundings that she didn't take notice of the night before. It looked as if a fight may have broken out because there was a set of doors that had been redone with slabs of wood. There was young looking man behind the bar who just stared at her as she walked out. He didn't have a leather cut on, so Alyssa assumed he wasn't a prosect. Gemma, who she recognized from her file photo, was across from the bar sitting in what could be called the living room area. There were two couches, a recliner, and three other chairs all forming a circle around a small coffee table. Gemma was holding a baby while another little boy was sitting on the ground coloring in a coloring book.

"Well good mornin'," Gemma said as she waved Alyssa over to her.

"Morning. Tara said she talked to you about me; I'm Alyssa. I work with Tara at the hospital." Alyssa stopped her babbling before she said too much. Just the look of this woman in her high heels, tight jeans, low cut top, and evil stare made Alyssa more nervous than she would like to admit. She didn't think it was possible for a grandmother to look that intimidating, especially with a baby in her arms. Alyssa realized quickly that Gemma Teller-Morrow wasn't the average grandmother or woman.

"Yes, she did. So, what happened last night? I mean how did he find you?" Gemma inquired, as if she knew Alyssa for years and should know these intimate details.

"Umm…" Alyssa paused wondering how much she should tell Gemma. She didn't want to seem too eager to give this information out in case Gemma thought that was suspicious, but at the same time, she didn't want to lie to her either, not knowing what Tara already said. "I don't really know. When I left New York, I left in the middle of the night and took a cab to a New Jersey bus station. I didn't tell a sole until I told Tara last night. I haven't even contacted my friends or family since I left for this exact reason."

"Well don't worry sweetheart, my husband and son will try and get to the bottom of this so your ex won't hurt you again."

"Oh, no, I don't think that's a good idea. I mean, I'm grateful for having a place to stay last night, but this is my problem. He already hurt my family back home. Tara is such a great person and you seem it too, which is why I—I cant have you guys getting involved. It's probably better if I just go home now." Alyssa stood up and placed her oversized purse over her shoulder.

"Oh no you don't darlin'." Gemma stood up, baby in hand, and motioned for Alyssa to sit back down. "Tara likes you. She says you're a good girl and don't deserve this shit and I believe her. Which is why you're gonna' sit here and wait till the guys get back so we can figure out how to help you."

Alyssa put her hands up in defeat and smiled at Gemma, "alright, you win."

"Damn straight," Gemma nodded back as she took out a bottle from the diaper bag at her feet and began feeding the baby who cooed back at her.

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><p>Three hours later after Tara had brought lunch and put the boys down for a nap, the sound of incoming Harley's filled the clubhouse. By that time, several other men and women had begun to show up, and were playing pool and drinking at the bar. Gemma who had gone next door to the garage to work was now walking back in the clubhouse arm in arm with Clay Morrow. Tara, who was already patiently awaiting the arrival of her fiancé, stood by the bar and fiercely hugged Jackson Teller as he walked in. Trager, Telford, Winston, Ortiz, and Munson followed him in. The older Winston had arrived a few minutes before them and had already sat at the bar waiting for his brothers to arrive.<p>

"Who's that?" Jackson Teller asked as Alyssa stood up and walked over to where he and Tara were embracing.

"This is Alyssa O'Donnell. We work at the hospital together. Alyssa, this is my fiancé Jax. There's something we want to talk to you about," Tara told her fiancé but was interrupted by the President's command.

"Church, now." Clay Morrow bellowed to the rest of the Sons as he walked in to the chapel and the remaining followed in after him.

"Later, okay?" Jax questioned Tara and nodded to her and Alyssa as he walked in to convene with the rest of the Sons.

"What are they doing in there?" Alyssa asked Tara as she followed her outside to a picnic table.

"That's where the club has their meetings. Just to discuss things about the bar, garage, and monthly bills and all of that kind of stuff."

"Oh. That's cool that they have their own space for that kind of thing. Are there only male members?"

Tara laughed at her comment. "Yeah. Women and the club don't mix unless they're having sex and that's about it."

"Wow. I didn't think that kinda' thing actually still went on."

"It's not as bad as I'm making it seem. Its just, it is a male's motorcycle club, so they like to throw around their male dominance and freedom."

"Yeah, I was gonna say—you don't seem like someone who would put up with that shit," Alyssa said to Tara, really believing it.

"No, I'm not. Jax loves me and respects me, as I do him. We had some rough patches in the beginning, ya' know, me just trying to find my place and how I fit in. But really, he is great and a wonderful father, I couldn't ask for anyone better!" Tara smiled as if reflecting on her life with Jax. "The rest of the members recognize me as Jax's 'old lady', which is what they like to call it, so they treat me like their sister. Its kind of like one big family." Tara paused and Alyssa looked at her wondering what else she was trying to say. "So I guess what I was getting at was that they type of women who hang around here are only here for one thing. I'm sure you could tell that by some of the girls already inside. The guys know that and I guess that's where their view on women stems from."

Alyssa and Tara sat on the picnic table for another fifteen minutes until Jax came out and sat with them. "So, what's going on?" he asked Tara as he eyed Alyssa.

"Well when I was leaving work yesterday I saw Alyssa already out by her car but there was a man with her. I saw that he had grabbed her and started shaking her. He was screaming things at her and then he all of a sudden hit her in the face," Tara pointed to the partially covered black eye. "I yelled at him to leave her alone or I was calling the police and he just took off."

Jax turned to Alyssa and asked, "Why didn't you call the police and file a report?"

Alyssa explained the situation exactly as she had to Tara the night before. Jax and Tara exchanged glances as if they were having an unspoken conversation with each other. Alyssa hoped that Jax would be sympathetic and not just send her on her way.

"I'll have Juice do some digging and see if he can find out where your ex is. If he's still around, we will persuade him to leave town. Until then it's probably a good idea for you to be with another person at all times."

"She doesn't know anyone else besides me, Jax. Between work and the boys I can't be with her all day."

"I'll see if Juice can hang around with her then. When he cant, she can just hang around at the club," Jax stated matter-of-factly.

Alyssa tried to interject, knowing any rational person would. "You guys, I don't need a babysitter."

"It's not a babysitter, more like a protector. If this guy is as dangerous as you made him seem then it's the best idea. Juice is a good guy and he won't bother you." Jax then turned his attention to Tara as if to say that was the end of the discussion. "Me, Ope, and Bobby gotta' go talk to Lyla and then take care of some other things. So, I probably won't be home till later." He stood up and kissed Tara on the forehead. "I love you."

"Love you too," she called after him as he walked back into the clubhouse. "Listen Alyssa, I know that having Juice hang around doesn't sound all that great, but it really is the best idea. I know deep down you agree with us. You know your ex is dangerous, which is why you moved all the way across the country to get away from him."

"I know," Alyssa admitted.

Tara raised her right hand up. "I will personally vouch for Juice. He really is a good kid. He can be kind of awkward in social situations sometimes, but that's just because he's so smart when it comes to other things."

"Well as long as you trust him. Anyone's gotta' be better than James."

"I do and you're right." Tara smiled at Alyssa.

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><p>After Tara had dropped Alyssa off in the hospital parking lot to get her car, she drove back home to her apartment. Juice followed on his motorcycle by orders of Jax and was now sitting in the ugly green chair in Alyssa's living room, laptop in hand. "So, should I start the search on your ex now?"<p>

Alyssa went into her kitchen and grabbed a glass from the cupboard. "Yeah. What information do you need to know?" She looked into the refrigerator forgetting she hadn't gone grocery shopping in the last week, as the empty sight in front of her confirmed.

"Uh whatever you got. Name, birth date, social, last known address."

"Okay. James Connor Kelly. 1-15-82.79th Street in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn 11209. I don't know the street number or his social," Alyssa said what she had practiced many times in the last few days.

"Okay, thanks."

She ended up taking ice out of the freezer and filled her glass with tap water. "Would you like anything to drink?"

"Nah, I'm good, thanks." Juice continued to stare intently at his laptop screen.

"That's good because other than sink water I've got nothing." Alyssa was about to laugh it off but then she realized Juice wasn't even paying attention to her anyway. He probably hated the fact that he had to come and babysit a girl who was on the run from her ex-boyfriend. "Well—I—I'm gonna' go shower now so I'll be out in a little while."

She walked to the bathroom in the back of the apartment and shut the bathroom door. She slid open the shower curtain, turned the water on cool, undressed, and slipped inside. She thought about the fake identity the agency set up for James Kelly, her supposed ex-boyfriend. She wondered how good of a hacker Juice would be. Alyssa knew that agency information like that _could_ be hacked, but it was unlikely a member of an outlaw motorcycle club could do the job. Only the most intelligent dedicated hackers could pull that off and that was in rare situations. But then she began to worry because the James Kelly background was a last minute addition to her story. The agency didn't spend as much time developing it as they did her identity. If Juice was good at what he did and spent enough time on it, she wondered if he would find the holes in James Kelly's life.

They agency wouldn't allow for the club to find Kelly because they couldn't risk something happening to another agent. They decided to have him attack Alyssa and then that would be the last time he would show up. Hopefully, once Juice couldn't find him in California, they would back off. Alyssa finished shaving her legs, turned off the water, and dried her body off. She told herself she wouldn't worry about the James Kelly issue because Juice wouldn't dig that far.

Alyssa decided that if she needed to, she would reach out to her contact for help on the James Kelly situation. Maybe they could arrange one last confrontation. The only problem was that she wasn't set up to have a meet for another three in a half months. The agency decided that no contact was best for this operation. Alyssa would take all the notes she could, keep them in her lock box, and deliver them exactly four months after her first day there. If the agency decided that what she had was enough, then they would pull her out. If they decided they wanted a little more information for their case then she would go back in for two more months, and the cycle would repeat again if ultimately needed.

Once dressed in a pair of jeans and a blue NY Giants t-shirt, Alyssa put mousse in her auburn hair and scrunched it. Her apartment didn't have an air conditioner yet and she couldn't bring herself to turn on the blow dryer. She was refreshed from her cool shower and didn't want to get all sweaty by just doing her hair. With only two weeks in California, she still wasn't quite used to the weather yet. New York weather could get extremely humid, whereas here in California the air is much more dry which makes the heat more bearable. Alyssa loved the weather and couldn't complain.

Alyssa decided not to put any makeup on today and let her bruise stick out while she was just lounging around. She looked herself once over in the mirror and went to sit in the living room. Juice looked like he hadn't moved an inch while she was showering. Alyssa sat on the couch and turned the television on to ESPN. It was Sunday, which meant game day, and the Giants would be starting around 4. Alyssa was a diehard NY sports fan and ordered the NFL Sunday Ticket from Direct TV the day she moved in. Whether she was undercover or not, she wasn't going to miss her team on game day.

"You a Giants fan?" Juice looked up from his computer screen for a brief moment.

"Hell yeah. Please don't tell me you're a Raiders fan," Alyssa laughed back.

"Nah. Giants all the way. I'm originally from Queens, so I guess my sports allegiances come from there. Giants, Mets, and Knicks."

"Okay, okay. Swap out the Mets for the Yankees and I'm good!"

Juice laughed and just shook his head no.

"Where in Queens? I'm from Bay Ridge myself."

"Woodhaven."

"Yeah, I think I know that area. Not gonna' lie though I spent most of my time right in BK growing up. Do you miss it?" Alyssa was thoroughly enjoying the conversation she was having with Juice.

"Sometimes." Juice paused and Alyssa wondered what he was thinking about. "I love Charming though and I don't think I would ever leave to go back to Queens."

Alyssa pointed to the computer on Juice's lap, "Have you found anything yet?"

"No. Mainly just shit from New York. I'll look again later on." Juice closed his laptop and set it on the coffee table in front of him. "Eventually he'll slip up and if he's still around here, I'll find him."

This made Alyssa worry. Juice was overly confident and his determined look only reverberated it. If James Kelly didn't make another appearance maybe Tara, Jax, and Juice would quit the search. Alyssa could only hope, but she wasn't going to dwell on the issue any longer.

"I've been so busy trying to set up and get acquainted with Charming that I haven't actually done any real grocery shopping. My cupboards and fridge are pretty bare. I think I should do a quick trip before the game starts."

"Okay." Juice stood up and grabbed the black zip up hoodie he was sitting on and pulled it over his cut and zipped it up. He followed her out the door and into her car. Alyssa was a little surprised that Juice was willing to go grocery shopping with her. She realized that it must be because he was given an order by his Vice President and no matter what it was he was going to follow it. Even if it meant following a girl around while she went grocery shopping.

Alyssa picked out all the standard munchies one would want while watching the game: chips, salsa, pepperoni, cheese, crackers, and a frozen pizza. Then she decided to fill the cart up because everything looked too good not to take home. She started with the basics: bread, milk, cheese, eggs, and cereal. Then she went from pop-tarts to pasta to fruit and vegetables. Her cart was filled up and she was happy that she had enough food to actually make a decent meal for herself for the next couple weeks. Juice didn't say anything while she shopped. He just watched her with a curious eye looking at all the food she was getting.

"What?" she asked him while she was unloading the contents of the cart on the register belt.

"Nothing," he flashed a wide smile. "Just wondering if you got enough?"

"Listen, I've been eating cereal all week for breakfast, lunch, and dinner." Alyssa laughed back with him, "I deserve all this."

Once they made it back to her place, Juice carried most of the bags inside. Alyssa went back outside for one more trip to get the last of the groceries and Juice started to empty the bags already inside. Before they could start to put anything away Juice's cell phone rang. He walked into the living room and answered it. Alyssa was about to walk over to see if she could hear anything when Juice came back.

"That was Jax, I've gotta' go help him with some shit. Do you want to stay here or go back over to the clubhouse?"

"I'll stay here. I wanna' put all this away then watch the game."

"Okay. I should only be a few hours. I'll be back later, make sure you lock the door and don't open it for anyone." With that Juice was out the door and Alyssa heard the rumble of his Harley start and take off down the street.


	4. The Kiss

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Sons of Anarchy, they belong to the genius Kurt Sutter and FX! Only the OC's belong to me.

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><p>Alyssa sat in her living room after the game had ended until eleven o'clock. Juice never showed up. She wondered if it was something serious or if he just ended up drunk at the clubhouse and forgot about her. She didn't know if he was a big drinker or partier but she didn't put it past him. The lifestyle of a MC member included a large amount of alcohol. It wasn't something she could argue with. One or two days throughout the week she might have a couple beers at the end of a hard day. She even liked going out on the weekends with her friends. Alcohol was almost always a part of those outings and she could hold her own. She was twenty-four years old, these were supposed to be the best years of her life. She wanted to thoroughly enjoy them.<p>

After she woke up and showered the next morning she wondered what to do on her day off. Jax told her when she wasn't with Juice she should hang out at the club. Alyssa wasn't sure if it would be okay for her to just show up at the club unannounced. Since it was a Monday Teller-Morrow would be open and there would be plenty of other people around. She didn't think it would look too odd if she went and hung out for the day.

Alyssa dressed herself in a pair of dark Se7en jeans and an aqua leopard print t-shirt with the words WILD CHILD written on it. She thought about wearing a pair of heels but decided against it and went with black flip-flops. She wanted a relaxed look and heels might set off the wrong impression. She grabbed her oversized purse and walked out the door.

When she pulled in the parking lot she saw Tara and Gemma walking out of the clubhouse. Alyssa parked her car and started to walk towards them when she noticed a skinny blonde already there. Gemma smiled at both of them and made the introductions while Tara had an unhappy look on her face.

"Lyla, this is Alyssa, she works with Tara. Alyssa, this is Lyla, she's Opie's old lady."

Alyssa shook hands with Lyla while the other three women finished their conversation. Lyla was wondering where her husband was because he hadn't gone home the night before. It seemed Juice wasn't the only one who didn't go where he said he would. Alyssa wondered what MC issue may have occurred that the men ended up crashing at the club.

Munson and Trager rode up on their Harleys when Tara was about to say her goodbyes and head to work. Before she could leave Gemma noticed Lyla walking in the clubhouse and made a mad dash towards her, while everyone followed. Whatever Gemma was trying to stop had already begun. Lyla was arguing with another female who made it pretty clear she slept with Opie the night before. The other girl, who Alyssa didn't recognize seeing at all the day before, pulled a gun on Lyla and everyone else in the club. The older Winston was holding Tara's youngest and turned around to protect the child. Alyssa stood next to Tara hoping the other girl would leave peacefully. Lyla walked away in hysterics as the gun wielding crazy woman walked out.

"Who the fuck was that?" Alyssa asked Tara as she went to get her child.

"Thanks, Piney," Tara said as he handed the baby over to her. "That was a stupid good-for-nothing whore. That bitch better not step foot in this club again or I swear I will kill her myself," Tara said as she was pacing the floor clutching her child. She was obviously shaken up, Alyssa thought. "I can't believe this shit. Now I'm late for work, again."

"Just tell them one of the boys were sick," Alyssa offered an excuse.

"I know, I've just been getting there late and leaving early a lot these past few weeks. I've gotta' get going. Are you gonna' be here all day?" Tara asked Alyssa.

"Yeah, I've got no where else to go. I figured I would just hang out till Juice got back. He left his laptop at my apartment so I thought maybe he'd come back and work on it some more tonight."

"Do you mind watching Thomas while I'm at work? Gemma was going to until I was done with my meeting and then I was going to bring him to Aleta—but it's probably better if I don't leave again today."

Alyssa smiled, excited she had a reason to stay and also because Thomas Teller was just too cute for words. "Of course. He'll keep me entertained. I was dreading having to sit here all day with nothing to do." Alyssa reached her arms out and took Thomas from his mother.

Before Tara could leave, Opie walked in bleeding from his eye. Alyssa wondered how much they depended on Tara for situations like these. She was probably getting calls all hours of the day and night when the members got beat up or shot. Tara's professional life was probably suffering, she said herself that she had been late a lot recently. Alyssa felt a pang of sadness for her. It was only a matter of time till it caught up with her. She hoped Tara wouldn't lose her job because the fact that she was always running off to help members of the club when they needed her. Alyssa forced herself to push the thoughts from her mind. She couldn't worry about what happened to Tara. As much as she would like to think they were becoming friends, they weren't. If Tara knew who Alyssa really was, she wouldn't think twice about turning her over to the club. Alyssa had to focus on the fact that she was just acting out a part. None of this was real for her.

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><p>It was after ten o'clock when Alyssa heard a knock at her door. She was in bed compiling her notes about the Sons. There wasn't much she had to work with right now. It was still early, but she wanted to be as detailed as possible, and she didn't want to forget anything that may be of importance later. She tried to add things, as best she could remember, about who was at the clubhouse and when they were there. Where they came from, when they arrived, when they left, and where they were going. Right now she really only had times of arrivals and departures. She knew her first night there that they were in Tucson and she hoped she would hear more about their destinations.<p>

She put all her notes in her lock box, slid it under the bed, and then walked to the front door. The chain lock was already on so when she opened the door it only opened a crack. She looked out and Juice was standing on the other side with a sorrowful look on his face. She shut the door and slid the chain lock off. Before she re-opened it she looked down at herself. She was wearing a navy blue tank top and shorts pajama set from Victoria's Secret. It wasn't anything sexy or revealing, but she wished the shorts weren't so short right now. She didn't plan on wearing them in front of anyone but they kept her cool on hot nights.

She opened the door and waved her hand towards the living room, a sign of invitation. She noticed as Juice walked in he was limping. He was trying to put as least amount of pressure on his right leg as he could. Alyssa couldn't help her curiosity. "What happened to you?"

Juice lowered himself slowly into the green chair while Alyssa sat cross-legged on her couch facing him. "I got shot."

Alyssa's mouth dropped open and she was sure her eyes almost popped out of her skull. "Are you serious? Are you okay," she asked Juice, still quite shocked. She had never seen anyone get shot before and no one she worked with had gotten shot since she had been there.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Tara stitched me up. Just hurts when I walk."

"Ohmigod, what happened?"

"Long story. It's alright, I'm fine."

It was clear he did not want to discuss the details about his wound anymore. Alyssa wasn't going to push him. "Okay. Is there anything I can get you? Are you hungry, thirsty?"

"Actually, I'm just exhausted." He tried to lean back in the recliner, but he couldn't put enough pressure on his good leg to get it to go backwards. "Sorry I didn't show up last night. I just got into some things and couldn't get away. Did ya' end up staying here?"

"Yeah. I went to the clubhouse this morning and hung out there for the day."

"Yeah, Tara mentioned you were there. She—uh—mentioned you wanted to do some more work on the computer tonight, but I was thinking, I can do more tomorrow if that's okay with you. I'm pretty tired." He rubbed the top of his head, his fingers going through his mohawk.

"No, please don't even worry about that. It can definitely wait." Alyssa paused for a moment not sure what else to say. "Did you wanna' crash here tonight or back at the clubhouse?"

"Well I'm supposed to be wherever you are and I'm sure you'll be more comfortable here—so here's good with me if it is for you." He tried to lean back in the chair again.

"Okay. Why don't you—uh—take my room tonight. You're clearly in pain and sleeping anywhere other than a bed isn't going to be comfortable."

"No, I can't take your bed. Thank you, but really, I can't."

"Well you are. There isn't going to be a discussion. There's no way I will sleep knowing you're out here trying to sleep in a recliner or on a couch with a gunshot wound." Alyssa got up and went into the kitchen. She filled a glass of water and then went into the bathroom to get two aspirin. She set the pills and water onto her nightstand and picked up her discarded dirty clothes off of the floor. She stuffed three dirty shirts and two pairs of jeans into the closet in her room. She gave it one last look over and nodded her head in approval. When she went back to the living room Juice was still sitting in the chair. She put her hand on her hip and gave a stern look, "come on, let's go," her tone was firm.

Juice just stared at her for a minute, his eyes looking her up and down. She started to feel a little uncomfortable in her outfit and wondered if she should have changed into sweatpants while she was in her room. She didn't budge in her stance though; she figured he was waiting for her to do just that, which is why she couldn't. "Now," she said.

He let a chuckle escape his mouth and turned it into a wide smile. She wasn't sure if he was amused with her or what. He began to stand up and winced in obvious pain. Alyssa walked over to him, not sure if she should lend him an arm or not. She didn't know if he was the kind of guy that would scoff at accepting help from a woman while he was in pain. She couldn't stand the look of him struggling, so she held her arm out anyway. If he shook it off that would be fine, but she couldn't stop herself from offering, that's not how she was raised. Juice accepted her arm and held on the whole way to her bedroom. He took off his cut then sat on the edge of the bed.

"I hate to ask you this, but is there any way you can take my boots off?" Juice asked her, with his head down. Alyssa didn't say anything, but just kneeled in front of him removed his left shoe and then his right, a little gentler. "Thanks," he said as he scooted himself on the bed.

"There's two aspirin and a glass of water if you need them. I'm not sure if Tara gave you anything, but if you wake up in the middle of the night and need them, they're there." Alyssa walked to her doorway and shut of the light. "Goodnight Juice."

"Alyssa, you can stay in here if you want. I feel bad kicking you out of your own bed. I mean, I can't really move, so I won't move from my side if you wanna' sleep in here. That couch out there doesn't look too comfortable."

Alyssa turned around but could only make out the outline of his body. She contemplated his offer for a few seconds. "Okay," she simply said. She walked around to the other side of the bed and got in ever so lightly, to not disturb Juice. She pulled up the light sheet over her and closed her eyes.

She laid there for a few hours in silence. Every now and then she would toss and turn, and right now she was on her side facing Juice. She kept her eyes shut; she didn't dare open them to look at him. She wasn't sure if she couldn't sleep because Juice was in her bed next to her or because she liked the fact that he was in her bed next to her. Alyssa hoped it wasn't the latter. It had been a long time since she was this close to someone and she was sure it was just the thrill of it all getting to her.

"You awake?" Juice breathed out in a low whisper.

She froze. She wasn't sure if she should keep pretending to be sleeping or answer him. She figured with all the moving she had been doing he had to of known she wasn't sleeping. "Yeah." She opened her eyes for the first time and looked at him. She still didn't have any curtains yet and the moonlight shining through her window made shadows on his face.

"Having trouble sleeping too?" She nodded back in reply and then he continued. "Can I ask you something?"

"Mm—hmm." Alyssa cleared her throat and readjusted herself so she could see him better.

Juice kept his eyes at the ceiling, not once looking at her. "Have you ever done something so bad that you just know there's nothing you can do to make it better?"

Alyssa wondered what was plaguing him. She could tell there was something off about him when he came in. It was more than just being shot, he wasn't that same person she had met the other day. Something was really bothering him. "Um, I dunno'. I guess I feel that there's always a way to be redeemed. No matter how bad you may think it is it's probably fixable. There's always ways to right your wrongs."

"God, I wish that were true."

He sounded defeated, like he truly believed that whatever it was couldn't be fixed. "Juice, what's wrong?" Alyssa was concerned and curious at the same time.

A deafening silence filled the room for a long time. She didn't dare speak again. She knew if he was going to tell her it had to be on his terms, she couldn't force it. He let out a quiet sigh and then spoke slowly. "The guy—who shot me—I uh—had to shoot him back. If I didn't—he was gonna' kill me." Alyssa didn't say anything, unsure if Juice had anymore to say. "Its just—the worst part is that—he was a Son. Even though I know I had to do it to save my own life, I just can't get it out of my head that I killed a brother."

Alyssa was glad that her back was to the window so the moon could not illuminate her face. She was completely stunned after what she just heard and she was positive her face showed it. She took a moment to gather her thoughts before speaking. Killing a member of your own MC was a huge deal. Alyssa didn't' know the details and because Juice was still alive, she figured that the other person was dirty. The club probably disposed of him discreetly and no one would ever know. She wondered who it was and if it would affect the investigation the ATF had going. "When someone's put in a position like you were, when its either you or someone else, everyone is gonna' make sure its not them. Ya' know? Nobody wants to die Juice and if that means killing to protect yourself, well, you gotta' do what you gotta' do." Alyssa was taught to never hesitate in her training. Even a split second could cost an agent their life.

"Yeah, I know. Its just you don't picture your family as the enemy though. I guess that's what's getting to me."

Alyssa didn't say anything but slid her hand over to Juice's and held it. She didn't want him feeling bad for what he had to do. It was obviously self-defense and he did the right thing. If he hadn't of, he wouldn't be here with her right now. She wasn't sure how else to convey that, so when he looked at her she leaned in and kissed him. It was a brief kiss, short, but still with meaning. She wanted him to know it was okay and not to feel guilty for being the one who was alive.

He looked at her; their faces still inches apart. She gave him a soft smile and waited to see if he would kiss her again. He did, and this time his hand cupped her cheek. She gave him access to her mouth and his tongue caressed hers gently. It wasn't a wild kiss, more sensual than anything. It wasn't filled with passion, but it still made the hair on her arms rise and the butterflies in her stomach go wild. She liked the feeling. She hadn't felt that way from just kissing someone in a long time. It made her feel like a schoolgirl playing seven minutes in heaven and getting her first kiss. She put her hand on his chest and then slid it to his upper arm, feeling the coarse muscles along the way. Her mind was racing with how much she wanted him in that moment but then she thought about the box beneath her bed and broke the kiss. She gave him a sweet smile and pecked the corner of his mouth, "goodnight Juice."

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><p><strong>AUTHOR'S NOTE:<strong>

Just wanted to send out a thank you to all of you who have reviewed thus far! I really appreciate it! I love getting reviews and hearing what you all think... any of you who haven't reviewed yet, please do, they make me want to write more for you!

I've also read stories before where the author had posted pics of what the characters are wearing and that kind of thing and I've loved it. I thought it was such a nice addition and helped visualize it better, so I decided to do that myself. I created an account on photobucket and added some of Alyssa's outfits and I will plan to add more as I go.

The account is: www . photobucket .com /glugentige

It is password protected and the password is: undercover

Don't forget to review! Thanks :)

-Jade


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